Saturday, 27 February 2021
A Tale as old as Time
If you’ve never been in a relationship with an abusive person it is almost impossible to recognise the abuse, especially if the abuser is a truly clever manipulator. There are several factors that hamper individual’s ability to detect the problem. Firstly, because “you” would never abuse someone you couldn’t imagine the mindset of a person that for whom abuse is just another tool to be used to achieve a goal, much less the mind of a person that would enjoy such a despicable thing. It is that inability to conceive the abusers mindset that often leads victims to engage in all kinds of justifications for the reprehensible behaviour of the abuser.
For the abuser the primary goal is control, once that’s been achieved the victim can be twisted and contorted in any way to satisfy the whims of the abuser. The abusers job is near complete when the victim has internalised the abuse. In a sense, they become possessed by the spirit of the abuser and exorcising that evil spirit can be painful. To an abuser the victim is merely a means to an end, an object to be controlled as opposed to a person to be cherished. This vision of another human being is also quite inconceivable to any well meaning soul and their naiveté and good nature operate as an effective blinker, blinding the victim to the real motives underlying the abusers behaviour which again can lead to a protraction of the relationship.
Few horrors equal the first moment of revelation that this person with whom you are engaged is truly and actually malevolent and few struggles are more terrifying that endeavouring to break free from the grip of a genuinely malevolent being.
Abusers can often become peculiarly bound to their victims. The ‘loss of control’ of the victim is an affront, an insult, a shame and these irrational creatures often become obsessed with the one that has escaped from their clutches and consequently plot and scheme to reclaim “their” possession or otherwise commit themselves to tormenting and wrecking vengeance for the perceived insult. However, once the victim comes to understand the pathology they become forever loosed from the abuser; in a sense, they become inoculated against this malignancy. Hence, are the abusers driven to pursue damage limitation by casting aspersions on the good character on their ‘beloved’. This is a tale as old as time.
Examples of the kinds of methods these dark creatures employ are: gas-lighting, isolation, terrorising, any and all things are justified in order to attain the end goal which is control.
The experience of abuse leaves an indelible mark. You can become cursed with anxiety as a result of the discovery that not everyone is full of sweetness and light and so can become suspicious and distrustful of everyone – even those who genuinely love you and who would do you no harm. This is a natural and instinctive reaction to trauma, instinct makes us conservative.
The fundamental dynamics of the relationship between an abuser and its victim can be found echoed in both micro and macroscopic dimensions, like between a government and its people. There is a huge trust relationship and a tremendous imbalance of power between the individual and the state and our ancestors, who were subject to an incredible amount of abuse at the hands of the state, have endeavoured to correct this imbalance through devices like a constitution. Abusers HATE to be impeded, which is remarkably ironic and spectacularly hypocritical because while they strongly resent having to be forced to conform to the will of the constitution they utterly love bending everything and everyone to serve their will. Consequently, malevolent state actors will intentionally seek to remove restraints on their action. They will often do this by so orchestrating events such that the victim will positively BEG the abuser to behave in the way the abuser wishes to behave [Problem/Reaction/Solution]. And so, malevolent state actors will shamelessly and with wicked intent contrive scenarios where the villain will appear as a hero all the while secretly undermining the victim – leaving them perilously exposed.
And just like the victim who could not conceive that they are in a relationship with a genuinely abusive person, so the unwary citizen is duped into thinking that the state is acting with their best interests at heart. Alas, waking up to this disturbing truth often occurs far too late and the abuse continues far longer than it should have because of the blindness of the citizen.
The story plays out nationally exactly as it does personally. Friends and family of the victim get involved because they care about their loved one and they despise the abuser. So they remonstrate with their loved one, ‘S/he’s a monster/a bad egg/you have to leave him/her’ but the victim clings to their abuser all the more while the villain vilifies family and friends, casting aspersions on their character. This exact scenario is what occurs when patriots speak out in defence of the nation. The abusive state depicts its critics as destroyers, not to be trusted, and wickedly intentioned - accolades which in truth belong to them.
Wherever there exists a tremendous imbalance of power, like between the state and the citizen, the likelihood of being abused is directly proportional to the naiveté of the people. As Mark Twain once said, ‘It’s easier to fool the people than to convince them that they’ve been fooled.’ In light of these reflections, one could say that it is easier to abuse people than convince them that they are being abused.
Rolling back on constitutional protections is not a path to peace, safety, and security. It is, without question and every single time it is indulged, a direct path to shame, destruction, despair and horror. All those who say otherwise are liars, thieves, and abusers of life and liberty and they cannot be trusted. Right now, for the first time in human history, the whole world has entered into an abusive relationship. The devastation will, likewise, undoubtedly be global.
Perhaps, when all this is done, some form of global constitution will be formed and the human race will learn to enshrine the sacredness of life, liberty, and the freedom to pursue happiness. Perhaps it will address and correct the imbalance of power between the citizen and the state, the consumer and the corporation, society and social media. Perhaps the world will learn the only cure for political treachery is lead and enact it quickly before these fools destroy us all. Perhaps, like the abuse survivor who emerges from the abusive relationship wiser and stronger – pledging to themselves to never entertain an abuser again, the whole world will finally learn how to protect itself from the wicked intentions and machinations of malevolent beings and, consequently, learn to live in peace and prosperity.
We’ve got a lot to learn and don’t we just love to learn the hard way?! God have mercy on us all.